Before You Can Rise You Must Halt

A contemplation about separating the imitators from the initiators.

Honesty, Acceptance, Loyalty, and Trust (H.A.L.T.) are themes I keep visiting, because they appear to me as the guide posts that lead to other values and virtues, that we individually identify with and embody throughout our various seasons. Concepts that evolve and transform through the lived experiences that shape our perceptions and perspectives, on this journey called life. 

“Before you can rise you must halt”

This was a phrase that came to me suddenly in February 2023. It felt loud, demanding, and came in such a way that I couldn’t ignore its call. Instinctively I looked up the definition of halt; 

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Halt

(v) bring or come to an abrupt stop. 

(n) a suspension of movement or activity, typically a temporary one.

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Curious…you have my attention.

As I sat and contemplated this odd, yet divinely timed, phrase I kept ruminating on how and why I/We perpetuate self-harming cycles both internally and externally. When I observe the narratives being conjured around me, I see nothing but lies built on a foundation of doubt, denial and betrayal, with half-truths sprinkled in to prevent a complete toppling of the proverbial tower. Salvation being sought in the absence of forgiveness. Bastardized assumptions of righteousness that appear to reinforce and deepen division, based on the looping perceptions, perspectives, and projections that one maintains to feel seen, heard, secure, validated, and loved.

Ultimately it reveals the hard truth of ‘As within, so without’.

It is why I believe global constructs can only survive on a foundation that requires we be traumatized beyond the womb. How the war within becomes the war with all (spiritual, psychological, emotional, physical, environmental etc.), is a looping and self fulfilling prophecy of the unconscious mind, due to the epigenetics that dictate cultural engineering. Therefore, it also highlights the requirement for a level of individual healing we can no longer outsource, by-pass, or ignore.

As we bear witness to aspects of collective consciousness that have been hidden in the shadows, the fragments of Self that make up the whole are being shaken and stirred in the process; a natural consequence of cause and effect. What appears to be following is a sifting process that organically separates the imitators from the initiators, the charged from the neutralized, the fanatics from the individuated, and the inflamed from the peaceful. This is where the polarizing pendulum swing that represents both sides of the same coin, is revealing the power that is waiting to be claimed in stasis.

“Before you can rise you must halt”. It’s beginning to make sense now.

HONESTY - I Am the Creator of My Reality

Key themes: courage; observation; reflection; self-accountability; self-responsibility; receptivity

You can dissociate and lie to your Self, but you cannot lie to the Most High; the Creation energy that is your birthright and runs through you, which ultimately creates the reality you experience. You always receive exactly who you Be, regardless of who, what, or where you choose to externally place your faith. If you seek truth, acceptance, loyalty and trust outside of you, it will never materialize if you cannot be honest about all of the ways you block your own expression of it.

ACCEPTANCE - I Am Present

Key themes: honesty; neutrality; self-assessment; self-forgiveness; remembrance; clarity

Failure to observe and accept what is appearing in the present moment with a neutral lens, invites the potential to create feedback loops born out of the need to protect or defend a memory that reaches into the past or projects into the future. These loops keep us sick, stuck and stagnant inside of a false identity, and out of clarity and connection with our highest creative expression. Acceptance is our greatest act of forgiveness, and is the only exit I’ve found to eliminate betrayal. Judgement is necessary. Being judgemental is not, and reveals a lack of acceptance that festers into self-betrayal if not observed and cleared.

LOYALTY - I Am Worthy

Key themes: honesty; acceptance; self-validation; honor; integrity; respect; will; patience; discipline; devotion

When we choose dishonesty through our lack of accountability and responsibility for our created reality, by default we choose to loop inside of familiar programs that enslave instead of liberate and stand in defiant betrayal of our birthright. Once we observe and acknowledge the aspects of Self that requires compassionate care through discipline and devotion, we can begin to cultivate the loyalty within that births the love, liberation and peace we’ve been conditioned to seek externally.

TRUST - I Am Wise

Key themes: Honesty; acceptance; loyalty; righteousness; humility; self-love; peace

If we cannot be radically honest with our Self to the extent that we can accept our role in the construction of our reality and make the individual adjustments required to not continually self-betray, trust cannot be secured. Trust begets trust. Shakey self-trust can become your greatest liability because those who have your trust also get your attention…and where your attention goes your energy flows. Idolatry is born out of betrayal because it represents a fundamental outsourcing of the trust we fail to cultivate for our Self, and it takes many insidious forms and shapes within the constructs, people, and energies that capture and hold our attention.

The quantum shift that is occurring within as I choose to HALT and observe everything and everyone that enters my life, has been immeasurable and invaluable. My ability to detach from what I am ingesting and create space to evaluate how something feels through the lens of honesty, acceptance, loyalty and trust has revealed many truths. It’s showing me the work I’ve been avoiding, how I’ve been self-censoring, what values need strengthening and what beliefs need releasing. Who can and cannot have access to me, the wisdom to know why, and how I choose to respond to what is vying for my attention. Why I’ve been avoiding my gifts, remaining on the periphery of my mission, and how to stand in and claim the fullness of it.

This is a level of accountability and responsibility I have consciously claimed, regardless of what shadows get illuminated against and within my Self or others who enter my spaces. This is the potent energy I am choosing to embody, through all aspects of my life because I am at peace with the fact that there is nothing to protect or defend but my willingness and ability to HALT at every twist and turn. It’s a complete acceptance of the path I’ve walked to get to this moment and all of the stories that may be conjured internally and externally about it.

For me, this is what it looks like to transform pain into power and purpose and be invited, initiated, and activated into claiming and emboding the truth of who you are.

Can you feel it?

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This article is part of a series of written contemplations that are guiding my own personal Grand Rising Experience and how it will inevitably seep into the Podcast, Portal and Summits. These are fluid concepts, both tangible and abstract, I find my Self flowing through as I seek to find greater wells of purpose and peace, through an embodied journey into the truth of who I am.

These musings represent the heavily nuanced conversations I am inviting into my life and holding space to have and explore more deeply. Please join me in the comments or reach out to me privately, if you feel called to share.

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